For the past couple months my work life has been very focused on one event, Ignite. We have been working towards a worship event aimed at "raising the passion meter" in our church. I have made lists, sent countless emails, scheduled rehearsals, ordered food, held meetings, discussed designs and so much more. Yes, I've planned, but not once have I worked to prepare my own heart and evaluate where I fall on the "passion meter". Do I thirst for my God? Do I seek after Him with passion and earnest? Maybe when I need something, maybe when I'm hurting, maybe when I'm in a trial, maybe.
We've been searching for scripture verses to display during an interlude and we've landed on Psalm 62:5-7. I decided Psalm 62 would be a good chapter to read this evening and I kept going into chapter 63. I was struck when I hit verse 1. How rare is it that I thirst for God like I would thirst if I had no water? I may thirst after things, things I'm asking Him for, things I want from Him or think I need, but do I thirst after Him? Just Him. Just time with Him. Just fellowship. Just communion. Just Him. I'm humbled to admit that I can barely remember the times I've done this. I'm so often distracted and motivated by an agenda when I approach my Savior. What would it be Iike if the only times I talked to my closest friends or family was when I needed something? If I only went to them when I had a specific need to be met? Or if I only focused on them during a specific hour and a half once a week? I can't imagine investing much time into a friend who treated me that way and I pray that I'm not that kind of friend, but all too often that's exactly how I approach my Savior.
Reading the Psalms tonight has left an unrest in my soul. I have no answers and no magic formula but for right now I'm OK with that. I want to let this unrest push me towards some change. I want to be more passionate about my Savior than I am about any other one or thing. Step one is stepping out on this limb and sharing this unrest, it's scary and humbling, but I need your help. Will you remind me of this unrest? Because I'll forget. I'll let other things take over and my passion will fade. Don't let me forget.
Let's turn it up, friends.
